There was a boy who never smiled. He wasn’t unhappy. He didn’t lead a miserable life. The boy simply didn’t smile. If there were a pile of puppies, at most his eyebrows went up and his forehead crumpled into a wreck. At most he looked surprised.

One day, on the playground, he spotted a girl who didn’t smile. He remembered she used to smile. He’d seen her smiling all the time, but no longer.

He went to her. She looked down and away and clamped her lips tight over clunky braces.

“I don’t mind if you don’t mind,” he said.

Digital Valentine

Digital Valentine is dedicated to showing the planet your love for your love this Valentine’s Day.

We’ll show up at their place of work, take profesh, posed photos and post them to all of their social media accounts with a special message from you. Choose from these packages:

Arrangement of flowers bigger than they are.
Arrangement of flowers and box of gourmet chocolates.
The flowers, the chocolate, and a bottle of sparkling champs.

Why so affordable? After the photo shoot, we pack everything back up for our next lucky Valentine. Because photo evidence is all they really wanted.

Go viral.


As if kids weren’t loud enough, someone decided to give my son a bullhorn for his birthday. A bullhorn.  

“Who hates our family this much?”, I thought as a trill of feedback sliced the air. His first impulse was to scream into the bullhorn. My ears barely stopped bleeding when he hit the police siren button, then the fart button. I chased him, a mix of hysterical laughter and butt burps trailing after him, wrestled the bullhorn away and threw another present in his arms as a diversion.

“Honestly, who would do this?”, I thought as he unwrapped another bullhorn.