My College Roommate

Living with a little kid is exactly like living with my college roommate. He hates wearing shoes and socks. He leaves comic books on the back of the toilet, and thinks it’s hilarious to pee off our balcony. His two food groups are cheese pizza and ramen noodles. He loves to burp. Side note; the house always smells like Italian or Chinese. We can spend up to forty-five minutes looking for the remote he lost. He listens to the same damn album over and over and over again. And sometimes I find him passed out and wedged behind the couch.