Honking

If I could get somebody in the automotive industry to consider new car concepts for next year, I really think it’s time to modify the horn. You honk and it just floats around, and people might wonder, “Who’s that for?” So I’m saying, no honk; roof mounted paintball gun instead. One shot, not rapid fire, that way you can zero in a direct SPLAT! and get their attention right away.

And if you’re the one car in traffic getting machine gunned by ten or twelve other cars, you might consider, “Oh, what did I do? My bad.” and stop texting!

Drop Off

The school entrance is choked with minivans waiting for the prime parking spot, the one right in front of the gate. Twice a day, parents block the flow of traffic to the empty parking lot twenty feet away, while teachers loiter by the gate wearing sunglasses to avoid eye contact. Parents won’t listen to them anyway. The police were called in to direct traffic last year, but parents snubbed them too. Angrily most times.

Everyone knows how to fix the problem and no one does a thing about it.

The real education begins out here, in the drop off zone.